If I can make it another 19 hours I think I'll be good. I think I can do it.
We had our finance exam this morning. It went pretty well. The last problem was a little tricky. I think I did it wrong. It involved finding the ending value of an annuity in which someone deposited $350 at a 7.5% rate compounded quarterly, then after like 5 years it changed to 6% compounded quarterly, then after another 10 years the payments changed to $600. Then the annuity sat in the account for another 6 years. And I accidentally valued the payments incorrectly because the interest did not accumulate in between each change. Bleh. So hopefully I still get most of the credit because my set up was 95% right. Yeah. Otherwise I think I did well.
It rained today. I wasn't expecting that. I want to find an umbrella that has an obscenely strong skeleton. I always feel like the umbrella is going to flip inside out. Which is exactly what I do not want.
After the finance exam I had to go print some stuff off for my class. While I was in the computer lab I talked with Abu a little bit. He's in all of my classes, so we were just discussing how we constantly feel like we're spending all our time working on one class, then we get behind in our other ones. It's really frustrating because we try so hard to keep up, but there is just so much going on. And I'm learning that our professors don't always realize the difficulty that we're having. I think that most people don't want to give the perception that they are struggling. But... I'll admit it. I'm having a hard time keeping up with everything. I've been doing it alright, it's just hard. And if my professors asked I would tell them exactly that.
After life contingencies (where we learned a billion new symbols...) I had to go teach my class. Most days I'm reasonably excited (aside from having to switch brain modes from life contingencies to intro level math) because I gave their tests back today. And most of them were not happy about it. I thought one girl was going to cry. I felt like a monster. After I handed the exam out I explained how I graded, why I gave some partial credit on some questions, why certain common answers received no partial credit. Many students completely zoned out today. They didn't care at all. One guy really impressed me. I posted the grades on Sunday and I'm guessing he saw his (low) grade then. So instead of getting upset at me, he took things into his own hands and read the chapter before coming to class. He encouraged a lot of people to do that because it was so helpful. I asked my class if there was anything I could do differently to help them prepare for the exam. And they all said that I had done a great job but that it was just hard material. That's when I thought the girl was going to start crying. She looked at me with this broken look on her face. She had tried her hardest and still not done as well as she wanted. I could just see in her face that she had just witnessed her hard work become nothing more than a 70%. So she looks at me, near tears and with the most dejected look, and said "It's nothing you're doing... this stuff is just really hard." I felt like such a failure. But we moved on. They did give me some suggestions on some things I could do differently, so I'm going to try that. After class I really wanted to email that girl and try to sort stuff out, but a) I had no idea what I would have said and b) I didn't want it to seem... bad, I guess. So I guess if she has an issue with the class I hope she is comfortable enough to talk with me about it. Anyhow, after class a group of about 5 students came and asked questions. I was really glad that they did. I invite them to challenge the answers. On a few people's I had totaled the bonus points incorrectly. But otherwise I just went through a few problems and explained how to get the right answer. After they saw how to do it properly they seemed ok with it all. I think it was just a matter of thinking that there was a mistake on my part and realizing that they had, in fact, made an error.
So that went ok. Afterwards I had lunch. Then I went to a meeting for all the 125 teachers. I was the only GA, and I didn't really feel like I had much to add. Oh well. After the meeting I got an email from Dr. Fischer about the GA meeting on Friday. He wants me to lead to discussion. So I think I'm going to talk about student-instructor in-class interaction. In accordance with my philosophy of education, I usually remain pretty transparent with my students. If I didn't get something graded because I was doing my own work I tell them. If there is something that I feel obligated to show them but they won't actually use, I tell them. If I feel that something is really important, I tell them. I don't keep information from them and I also include them in the process of learning-creation. I ask them questions about what I can do better or about what things should be different. I allow them to critique me, and most of them feel comfortable doing so (and I have had no issues with students being mean or unprofessional). It's always very helpful and respectful suggestions.
When I got back I tried to study. I really did. But I just couldn't focus on it. I applied to a few more internships. And tried to study. But it just didn't happen. My brain was so worn out from the exam and the rest of the day.
I made meatloaf for lunch. It was decent.
I went to small group tonight. I like that. I read the wrong chapter though, so even though I thought I was prepared... I wasn't.
Um. There's more that happened I'm sure, but I'm really tired right now so I'm going to go go to bed. Good night.
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