10.13.2011

Day 145

Last day before break = completed.  I will be on break in less than 12 hours.


So today.  I got up a tad late, but that's ok.  I walked from the parking lot with Jordan and Erica.  I have no idea what we talked about... that feels like it was 8 years ago.  In finance we started talking about bonds.  And I had a terrible time following.  I just couldn't focus.  I kept zoning in and out.


In between classes some of us had a very nice rant about why we're not getting many internship interviews.  It really comes down to the fact that the people getting interviews have one thing that really stands out.  The one guy who has 2 exams passed.  Another who has 1 exam, good grades, and research experience. The girl who had a 4.0 GPA and played soccer.  So even though I'm achieving on par with (or better than) some of the people getting lots of interviews... that isn't translating into much for me at the moment.  So that's been really difficult and stressful, just knowing that I've only gotten three interviews, I bombed one of them and got a rejection email from the other.  I hope my interview on Wednesday goes well. I'm pretty nervous since it might be for their "professional employment" position, not an internship.  In which case... they must not have looked at my resume closely at all.  Because I definitely say that I'm looking for an internship and I certainly have no exams passed.  And everyone else at the table was in pretty much the same situation. So tomorrow I'm going to talk with my advisor to see if there is something I should change about my resume.  I'm just getting really worried about the lack of interviews I've had.  I know that there will be more in the future... but I just get nervous.


During life contingencies Mr. Dean was going to show us how to build life tables in Excel, but the projector wasn't cooperating.  So we didn't do that.  We just worked some more on this problem and... I'm not really sure what we were trying to do most of the time.


Then I taught.  We did some more stuff with probabilities.  After class I gave them a possibility for some extra credit.  They have to give me an explanation to the classic Monty Hall problem.  And I need to bee convinced that they understand.  We'll see how that goes.


After class I went to my office, ate lunch, and looked online for internships that don't require an actuarial exam.  There aren't many.  I don't even know how many I filled out.  They take so long... I might have done 5 in 2 hours.  When I finished with that I met Kathryn in the computer lab to work on Finance.  I had invited everyone else but they were all busy.  This finance assignment was done in Excel and I'm pretty comfortable with Excel.  So I showed her how to use formulae and all that fun stuff.  It was pretty straight forward.  I think we finished it in just under two hours.


I made stir fry for dinner.  It was pretty good.  I added a little too much cayenne pepper again.  It was good... just a little too much kick.  Oh well.  I was going to go work out... and grade... but neither happened.  Grading shouldn't take long. Maybe an hour.  Something.  It will get done.  But not tonight.  Because I'm going to bed now.  Night!

10.12.2011

Day 144

I got to sleep in this morning.  It was amazing.  And by "sleep in" I mean "I woke up at 7:30."  Oh well.  I was going to work out today but decided I'd rather get some extra work done.  So I did a little bit of stats before I showered and went sit in the office for a while.  I got less done than I was hoping and I'm not sure why.  I really didn't get distracted that much.  It just seems that my work took a lot longer than I was expecting.  But I got all my grading done and a general idea of what I'm going to teach tomorrow.


After I was done in my office I came back to my apartment.  I was kind of sad that I didn't get to interview with Aon-Hewitt.  The guys who did the presentation last night were really nice and just seemed like they were a lot of fun.  I sent one of the guys a thank you email with my resume attached, so hopefully something comes of that.  They seemed to like me, so perhaps they'll put in a good word for me.  We'll see.  I'm going to hold my breath though.  I've accepted that I'm not the first round candidate for these companies.  Three of the people in my class are.  They've each had 8 or 9 interviews and a couple second interviews.  I've had three.  :/  And a fourth after break.  Oh well.  Something will certainly happen.


But yeah.  I worked on stats when I came back.  I'm going to have a lot of work to do over break.  I'll need to finish stats homework if I don't finish it tomorrow, finish whatever finance homework I don't do tomorrow, study for my stats quiz on Wednesday, look at the next chapter of life contingencies and review what we've done (maybe), and possibly start working on the practice exam for my class.  But I doubt that I'll get around to that.  I feel like I just gave them an exam.  Well, it won't be a couple more weeks before I give it to them.  We'll see how all of this goes.


Hm.  I had stats class tonight.  It went alright.  I think that following along in the book as she lectures will be more helpful than just trying to take notes on everything.


Pretty much the rest of the night I just went between preparing for my lesson, doing stats, cleaning (a very little bit), and zoning out because I couldn't concentrate anymore.  Which is a lot like right now.  So... I'm going to bed.  Good night all.

Day 143

I just had to check my clock to see what day it was.  I thought it was at least Thursday.  Nope.  Still Tuesday.  Which is good, since I still have plenty to do before I leave on Friday.


Since it is still Tuesday, that means that I had class this morning.  It seems like so long ago.  Actually it seems like an entire day has past since I went to class.  In Finance we got a homework assignment due after break.  It appears that I'll need to brush up on my Excel skills, because he wants it all done there.  Which in the end will make it easier, I just haven't used much Excel recently.


In between classes I did some work in the computer lab.  Timbo and David where there also.  And I put in a course request submission for the spring.  While I was up there, Mr. Dean came by and told us about an exam P prep class that will be offered in the spring that he highly recommends.  So I'm going to take that instead of corporate finance, which I figure I will have ample opportunities to take at some other time.


During Life Contingencies we learned that we will be having a project that will involve Excel (since that's a very useful tool for actuaries).  But Mr. Dean is going to give us an Excel lesson before hand, because most people are not very confident with it.  So that will be good.  I'm decent with Excel for basic formula editing and such, but nothing too advanced.


After class I taught.  It's very difficult to transition between a finance/probability class to... intro math.  But I think I've been doing alright.  I didn't feel very prepared for my lesson today.  There was just so much information to cover today.  But I got through it with a few minutes to spare, so I just went through a few examples, even though I know that they're going to complain that I didn't cover enough of the material for the homework.  After class was over Caleb came up to me.  He informed me that it was Keegan's birthday and that they were going to lunch with some of their friends to celebrate.  They wanted to know if I would like to join.  It sounded like fun, so I decided to join them.  It turns out that the main reason they asked me was because they wanted to go to some dining area on campus at which students are not allowed to eat during the lunch hour...unless accompanied by an instructor.  So I went in there, explained that the group of 5 guys (only two of whom are in my class) are with me.  But that there was no way I was going to pay for them :)  It was a very nice set up and the food was really good.  I also enjoyed talking with those guys.  It was a lot of fun.  I was telling them that I always pack my own lunch because I live on a pretty tight budget.  I explained how I usually spend around $25 a week on groceries and that lunch (generally) costs me around $6 for the week.  One of the guys looks at me and says "I just spent over $8 on this lunch... you're crazy."  Most of my friends feel that way as well.  But I manage.


After lunch I went to go work out.  That was less fun than lunch.  I did finally find the locker room and the scale.  Apparently since moving to school I've lost 12 pounds, which would explain why my pants feel so big.  I guess I can thank regular exercise, less food, lower carbs, and salads everyday for lunch.  And usually sufficient sleep.


When I had finished my work out I came back, took a shower, then did some internship related stuff.  I sent an email to thank my interview from last week, sent another email to Jackson to see where there were in the review process for interns, and then applied to some place that Mr. Dean recommended to us.  That took a while because the website tried to just take information from my resume and... I think it tried to just throw it around into random text boxes while simultaneously destroying my meticulous formatting, instead of trying to preserve experience and explanations in a natural progression.  So if that was the intention, I've never seen such an effective website.


After that I did a little states homework.  Then it was time to go to the informational session for Aon-Hewitt.  It was really good.  The two guys presenting were very nice, younger, and lively.  They were very excited about their jobs and their company.  I liked that.  I was sad that I didn't get offered an interview though.  I think that would have been a good interview.  They seemed to like me.  There were only 5 of us at this session... I'm not sure why.  But it was nice to have that close atmosphere.  And then we got to all take pizzas home because there was so much extra!  Woo!


When I got back I worked on stats some more.  Then...decided that I couldn't concentrate anymore so I played Team Fortress for a bit.  I talked with Dustin on Facebook about some of the homework and we got another problem finished. It's difficult to do math via any sort of textual message, especially when so many of the things we do have superscripts and subscripts....


And now it's bed time.  Good night all.

10.10.2011

Day 142

Well.  It was Monday today.  Indeed.


I got up a little late this morning but still got to class on time.


I just completely zoned out and got lost in my own thoughts for about 5 minutes.  Does that happen to anyone else?  It's odd.  With this whole moving thing and getting used to a new lifestyle I've started thinking more about my coping mechanisms.  And one that has proven to be especially useful over the years (that I am quite certain is incredibly unhealthy) is to pretend like bad memories don't exist.  Obviously I take care of whatever physical needs require attention, but if it's simply a memory that causes me displeasure I simply push it away until it becomes a fading memory.  After a while of that I just unconsciously pretend as if it never happened.  I've never really gotten into conversations about coping mechanisms (it usually gets too close to people's personal pains, which few people like to discuss I have realized), but I always wonder if other people cope the same ways that I do.  So that was a summary of my little zoning out right there.


Anyhow.  I had class this morning.  After which I went to my office and ate lunch.  This week for my lunch I seasoned the chicken with cinnamon and cayenne pepper.  And it tastes amazing.  The cayenne adds enough of a kick to make you want more and the cinnamon just tastes heavenly.  Unfortunately I didn't get enough salad dressing, so it tasted a lot like plain lettuce.


When I had finished with lunch I went to go work out.  Timbo was down there.  I've come to the conclusion that I just can't get motivated to push myself very hard in the weight room.  I do push myself some... but I'm never sore afterwards.  I just can't motivate myself enough to work that hard without a group or such.  Blech.  Oh well.


After working out I tried to find the locker room so that I could weigh myself but I could't find it.  So I just left.  Came home.  Showered.  Played Team Fortress during my snack break. Graded.  Then went to class again.  I really didn't feel like I got much out of the lecture today.  Bleh.  And we have a quiz the day after break.  And a homework assignment to turn in.  I have about a third of it done, I think.


I came back after class and had corn chowder for dinner.   Then I watched Transformers while I graded the rest of the extra credit papers. And I just finished writing my lesson plan for tomorrow, so that means that it's bed time!  Night!

Day 141

Woo Sunday!


I woke up before my alarm went off.  I'm really not a big fan of this.  It's just silly if you ask me.  But either way I woke up, had a shower, ate some breakfast, then went grocery shopping.  I didn't need much so I was hoping to make it under $20, but it didn't quite happen.  Mostly because I had to buy a razor.  I was going to just get new cartridges for the razor I have, but I just don't want to spend that kind of money anymore.  So I got a new razor which was way cheaper than getting new cartridges.  I'm looking into getting a safety razor, but don't have the money at the moment.  I'm trying to save some extra money so I can buy the extra gas to go to Mount Vernon on Friday so I can drive up with Kimmy.  So that's my plan and it's going decently so far.


After grocery shopping I came back, did some life contingencies.  Then I went to church with Jessie and Richard.  The pastor talked about sin and how destructive it is.  And how important it is to recognize that only Jesus can fix all the things.  It was pretty good.  I'm not sure what triggered it, but at some point I started thinking about a conversation he and I had the other day.  He grew up Catholic and he was telling me that their teachings, people from Protestant denominations weren't going to heaven.  And I told him that it was peculiar because in Protestant churches they are taught the exact opposite.


After church we went to Pita Pit for lunch.  It was very tasty.  Basically Subway on a pita.  Very tasty.  Then we went back to Jessie's apartment for apple pie!  So there was even more tasty.


Eventually I had to do work, so I came back and worked some more on life contingencies.  I called a few different people about it and verified answers.  Then I did some grading for a while.  I'm going to try to get the extra credit papers back this week.  We'll see!


I think that I need to start taking more dedicated time off.  I'm finding that I just start zoning out throughout the weekend and am probably less productive than if I would just take some time off.  Or maybe just do work in the morning and afternoon and take evenings off.  That should work.  I'll give that a try soon.


Alright.  I was staying up so that I could try to sign up for another interview because I got an email saying that I was an alternate.. but I guess that means that I just need to check back periodically in case someone cancels.  Not that there would be an opening at midnight.  Oh well.  So yeah.  Night!

10.08.2011

Day 140

So I woke up a little early this morning. For a Saturday, anyways.  I guess 8:30 isn't really that early.  But yeah.  I woke up.  And I ate breakfast.  I spent a while balancing my checking account, then figuring out how to spend/save my paycheck.  That all took a majority of my morning because I'm realizing that I can't just accept the fact that I get paid the same amount every two weeks and can just use the same way of allotting that money every week.  For some reason I feel the need to recalculate all of my spending and saving every paycheck.  Even though I usually figured it almost the exact same way every time.  I'm silly like that.  I also made myself a really big omlette for breakfast.  It was ok.  I didn't have any cheese to put in it and the only meat I had was leftover meatballs.  Pro-tip: meatballs don't really taste that good in eggs.  I also think I put too much Italian seasoning in my meatballs.  Or something.  They're a bit too potent.  I also think that I need to change up my meats from just chicken and ground turkey.  I believe that those are the only meats I have bought since moving here... and I don't have much I can do with the ground turkey.  Something needs to change, that's for certain.


The rest of the day just kind of went.  Some of my friends and I went to the BSU football game since it was the homecoming game.  We left near the end of the third quarter and BSU was losing 28 - 0.... yuck.  I don't know much about football... but they played horribly.  Unless the idea of the game is to drop most of your passes and never get a first down.  In which case BSU was winning more than any team in history.


I had a really hard time getting motivated today.  I got some non-school related stuff done.  Like... I did some laundry.  And I thought about straightening my room.  And I thought about cleaning my bathroom.  And I had soup for dinner.  I don't think I'll be getting that kind again.  It wasn't very good.  It was some sort of sirloin burger stew or something.  Meh.  Not a big fan.


I did end up getting some of my stats homework done.  That class is really frustrating for me because I've never learned well from math books and I class can be hard to follow.  So most of the time I feel like I'm flying blind when I do the homework.  On the plus side, since I've been spending so much time on life contingencies recently I feel pretty good about it.  I'm going to finish the last problem tomorrow.  It shouldn't be too bad.  I also talked with Tim about one of the problems.  He gave me a really good tip that will be really helpful in the future.  We're finding that very often integrals with a term of x*e^(a*x), which involves the use of integration by parts to solve.  Though it's fairly straight forward, it takes time that I won't have on the actuarial exams.  So I'm going to work on memorizing the general form of the equation so that I don't have to use integration by parts every time.  That should make things easier.


Yeah.  Umm... I'm going to go to bed now.  I remember earlier that I had something I wanted to right about... but I can't remember it now.  Except that there's a concert for Wolfgang Gartner in Chicago that Derrick and I want to go to at the end of the month.  But I need to see if that's doable.  But for now, I'm going to bed.  Night!

Day 139

It appears that I forgot to update last night.  So quick update for yesterday.


Yesterday I had class.  We talked more about amortization schedules in finance, but this time we focused on non-level, irregular payments.  It makes a lot of sense, so I have a feeling that it's going to suddenly get really difficult.  So, you know.  Yay.


Between classes we went to the Atrium.  Dustin and I worked on and discussed our life contingencies homework.  We all talked about...something.  I really can't recall what.  But it was a good talk, I'm sure.  Except when people started singing Friday by Rebecca Black.  Then it got less enjoyable.


In life contingencies we worked through a few problems.  I had already done most of them, but I had some practice in working through them faster.  So that was really good.  I'm learning that basically we shouldn't think of formulas. We have to just see the problem and start putting it in terms that are usable (generally life values from a life table).  Which, clearly, the equations don't do. So it's... tricky.


After class I came back and played Team Fortress for a little bit.  Timbo came over.  He and I did some homework and grading and such.  I didn't feel like doing a lot of homework, so I just graded and read some more extra credit papers.  Some of them are pretty good.  Others... they mean well.


Then last night I watched part of the Boise State game with Dustin and Liz.  Timbo was going to meet up with us after his date, but I guess it wasn't over when he thought it was going to be.  But that's ok.  We had fun anyway.  And then I came home and went to bed!  The end.